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Writer's pictureDr. Maria Paredes

That I Would Be Good

Updated: Apr 29, 2020


©Maria Paredes, PhD, LPCS, CEDS

The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, Then I can change. -Carl Rogers quote

Often times, we offer ourselves conditional acceptance,

denying ourselves full acceptance.

We tell ourselves that we are only good, only deserving, only lovable

IF we meet some outside criterion of expectation.

When we allow ourselves full acceptance or worth only once we have achieved this expectation, we prevent ourselves from experiencing the

power and freedom of unconditional acceptance.

Listen to Alanis Morissette’s song That I Would Be Good here and,

as you listen, set aside disbelief for the moment and allow yourself to consider the words as truths. You can find the lyrics to her song at the bottom of this page.

After listening to the song, complete the lyric stems below as they relate to you. Allow yourself to fill in the stems with your worst possible fears.

Fears that have, perhaps, prevented you from experiencing

acceptance,

worth, or

love

without strings attached or conditions to be met.

Consider how life might be different if you were able to offer yourself the same type of unconditional acceptance

you may find yourself easily offering to others you love.

That I would be good even if I did _______________________________

That I would be good even if I got _______________________________

That I would be good if _______________________________________

That I would be good even if I gained _____________________________

That I would be fine even if I went _______________________________

That I would be good if I lost my ________________________________

That I would be great if I was no longer ___________________________

That I would be grand if I was not _______________________________

That I would be loved even when I _______________________________

That I would be good even when I am ____________________________

That I would be loved even when I was ___________________________

That I would be good even if I __________________________________

That I would be good even if I do ________________________________

That I would be good whether or not _____________________________

Lyrics to That I Would Be Good

by Alanis Morissette

That I would be good even if I did nothing

That I would be good even if I got the thumbs down

That I would be good if I got and stayed sick

That I would be good even if I gained ten pounds

That I would be fine even if I went bankrupt

That I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth

That I would be great if I was no longer queen

That I would be grand if I was not all knowing

That I would be loved even when I numb myself

That I would be good even when I am overwhelmed

That I would be loved even when I was fuming

That I would be good even if I was clingy

That I would be good even if I lost sanity

That I would be good whether with or without you

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