©Maria Paredes, PhD, LPCS, CEDS
Often times, we offer ourselves conditional acceptance,
denying ourselves full acceptance.
We tell ourselves that we are only good, only deserving, only lovable
IF we meet some outside criterion of expectation.
When we allow ourselves full acceptance or worth only once we have achieved this expectation, we prevent ourselves from experiencing the
power and freedom of unconditional acceptance.
Listen to Alanis Morissette’s song That I Would Be Good here and,
as you listen, set aside disbelief for the moment and allow yourself to consider the words as truths. You can find the lyrics to her song at the bottom of this page.
After listening to the song, complete the lyric stems below as they relate to you. Allow yourself to fill in the stems with your worst possible fears.
Fears that have, perhaps, prevented you from experiencing
acceptance,
worth, or
love
without strings attached or conditions to be met.
Consider how life might be different if you were able to offer yourself the same type of unconditional acceptance
you may find yourself easily offering to others you love.
That I would be good even if I did _______________________________
That I would be good even if I got _______________________________
That I would be good if _______________________________________
That I would be good even if I gained _____________________________
That I would be fine even if I went _______________________________
That I would be good if I lost my ________________________________
That I would be great if I was no longer ___________________________
That I would be grand if I was not _______________________________
That I would be loved even when I _______________________________
That I would be good even when I am ____________________________
That I would be loved even when I was ___________________________
That I would be good even if I __________________________________
That I would be good even if I do ________________________________
That I would be good whether or not _____________________________
Lyrics to That I Would Be Good
by Alanis Morissette
That I would be good even if I did nothing
That I would be good even if I got the thumbs down
That I would be good if I got and stayed sick
That I would be good even if I gained ten pounds
That I would be fine even if I went bankrupt
That I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth
That I would be great if I was no longer queen
That I would be grand if I was not all knowing
That I would be loved even when I numb myself
That I would be good even when I am overwhelmed
That I would be loved even when I was fuming
That I would be good even if I was clingy
That I would be good even if I lost sanity
That I would be good whether with or without you