I Am Not A *Good* White Person

Alternate titles: Why We Need *Healthy* Shame For Anti-Racism Work OR When Your Boundaries are Gaslighting Marginalized Individuals OR Us White People Love to Talk about Boundaries, Walls, & Trigger Warnings This past summer, an announcement came across the listserv for the pool we belong to advertising an “Americanism” meeting. I made a passing comment to a friend about how crappy it was that the pool was having such a meeting. She replied with “Well, come on now. Let’s not make assumptions. Maybe it’s about something else.” “I have no doubt what the meeting will be about.” I replied. “Well then, why are we members there?” she asked, “We shouldn’t be supporting it!” We do avoid certain

OBGYN Appointments After Loss or Infertility: 6 Tips

Hi, I’m Christina. I have been pregnant three times. I’ve given birth once at 26 weeks to a micro-premie. I have gone through IVF 10 plus times. I have twin boys born via a gestational carrier. We have battled infertility and multiple pregnancy losses. Our journey to create our family is complete. Yet, a reminder that I am incomplete comes every year when I go to my annual OB-GYN appointment. From the paperwork to the check out counter, I am forced to take stock of the trails and traumas that I have endured on my path to motherhood. The appointments are necessary for my health, but wreak havoc on my emotions. After my family was complete, I selected a new OB. In fact, my OB isn’t even an OB.

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Maria Paredes, PhD, LPCS, CEDS-S

Three Birds

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Email: threebirdscounseling@gmail.com

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